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Greetings from L’Etage, the second story of Beau Monde on 6th and Bainbridge. The candles are lit, the mood is festive, the wifi is tenuous but holding steady. Stay tuned for live updates on Philly’s first story slam of 2008!

If this is your first slam, here’s some background: ten people are selected at random from a group of people who have signed up in advance, and have five minutes each to tell a (true!) story centered around this month’s theme of “Good Intentions,” and they are judged by audience members. There are no limits set on who can participate, so it looks to be an eclectic cross-section of tellers of stories and livers of lives.

The space seems conducive to the baring of souls: dim and bistro-like, it kinda just makes you want to get snookered on red wine and reveal a dark secret.

8:27 – It’s filling up in here! The crowd has settled in with drinks. The audience is beautiful and hip. The reward for winning this evening’s slam is a golden ticket to the “championship” storyslam in November, the winner of which will be crowned the Best Storyteller in Philadelphia.

8:37 – The evening’s host, Ed Tettemer, starts us off with a charming Garrison Keillor-like story whose punch line involves an escort service. I would try to re-tell it, but I think the nuance would be lost in the printed word . This evening’s judges will be Tippy, Susan, and Alex. Major audience shouts-out to last years winner, Juliet Wayne (my apologies for any misspellings.)

First up, Kevin Lee!

Kevin Lee tells an affable tale of the creative ways he raised money for a charity, first inspired by a hot triathlete. He went on to dye his hair green and mentor other fundraisers to generate thousands of dollars worth of donations. A mentee of his seemed to be slacking, and he wondered if he should drop her – but lo and behold at the last minute, she organized a fundraiser that made $7000 in a night – moral of the story: sometimes the best of intentions turn out really well.

Heather Dooley is a charismatic blonde with a pixie cut. She tells of a childhood raised by “gypsies,” transient parents who worked odd jobs and, at times, lived out of a tent. She and her sisters came out of this environment with a strong urge for stability and success. The three of them are doing well and, sounds like, conquering the world. Best of luck Heather!

Ben changes tone with an intense, emphatic story about a girl he taught who died of leukemia and the sermon at her funeral. “To hell with good intentions and to hell with the look in his eyes, ’cause the kid in the box was the best kid I ever met.”

Our next contestant, (whose name I think is Josh but correct me if I’m wrong!) is a tall, scruffy guy who takes us into R-rated territory with a story about a…present…his girlfriend left him to keep him entertained while she was away. Adding a little pizazz to the telling is a heckler named John and frequent mentions of the world “lubricant.” I’d go more in depth but my parents are reading this. (Hi guys!)

9:15 – The bubbly Hannah (a first-time storyteller, congratulations!) is the last storyteller of the first half. Hers is a story of undergraduate debauchery, love quadrangles, one night stands, and “fingers lingering a little too long over the cheese fries.” My personal take-home message from her story (and possibly the whole evening) is an intriguing drink called the Gin Bucket, whose ingredients include Fresca, Banker’s Club, and lemons (for a touch of class), and is served out of turkey basters.

9:40 – We’re back after the break! Welcome Lou! His tone is relaxed and he sounds like he’s telling a story over the kitchen table. He begins “I hate telemarketers.” He is a good way into telling one off when he realizes it’s the charity to whom he has donated his car…

Mike is our first “10″ of the evening”! He’s got the lilt and timing of a comic and a wacky story about that old crowd pleaser, human remains! He and his buddy bought a car in the trunk of which were the ashes of “the Bukowskis,” of which the previous owner had accidentally forgotten to dispose. Mike and his friends find adventurous and creative ways to honor, and finally release, these strangers – including by making them guests at at Dj’d dance party and a murder mystery dinner.

Ariel is what a high school teacher might call a “young woman of poise.” Her story is about the Grand Canyon trip her highly religious grandparents took her on one summer, forcing her to miss her birthday and the end of school, and how the beauty of a summer thunderstorm finally allowed them to see eye to eye.

Kendra’s story is about an “animal communicator,” or in layman’s terms, pet psychic. She is animated, she is articulate, and the crowd (and judges) love it – another 10! She is apparently “on” tonight, because she is also the winner of the raffle!

Andrew is the last story slammer of the evening. Drink in hand, he regales us with a a story of a German love in Texas, with whom he used to race tumbleweeds (“Lightning” and “Speedy”) across a basketball court. The story turns eerie when, with another guy (and rival for the German’s affections!) he writes a ghost story which, a while later, the three of them actually live out in real life.

This concludes our ten story slammers, all of whose good intentions to tell a good story were well-realized. And, now, drum roll please, the winner is…

(pause so you may drum with your hands on the nearest available surface)

KENDRA! She receives the golden ticket which will take her to farther reaches of storytelling, and the glory of winning First Person’s January 2008 Story Slam.

Thanks for sticking with me this far, and a very special thanks to my last minute “tech support,” Karla Kaminski. She would like the world to know that in the bag of “Shark Bites: Fruit Flavored Snacks” that she found in her pocket this evening, she got not one but five Great Whites.